Thursday, January 16, 2014


So I've been thinking a lot about what I want to accomplish this year, and while not replacing my hastily thought up post the first week of the year, I'd like to make an addendum.  There's a lot I want to do this year.  In the past, I've never really made a secure list of things I'd like to accomplish.  I don't know if this will make a different or not, but at least it will do one thing:  I'll stop thinking about all the things I put on the list.  

It's just the way my brain works, which is why I keep thinking about what I'm going to do after I graduate.  For those of you who don't know, I'm about to enter my final semester of college.  I have the hard decision of staying in Buffalo, or returning to New York City.  For many, that wouldn't be a hard decision at all.  However, Buffalo is where my life, friends, relationship, connections, and prospective job opportunities lie.  New York City is NYC, of course, and you can't beat that (especially if you've lived there your whole life like I have).  However, NYC holds nothing but family and a couple of close friends for me.  I have no life and no connections, no job prospects, no chance of making it in the art scene, and no where enough money to live comfortably.

You might say, at this point, it seems like the choice is easy, correct?  Not yet.  Buffalo holds all the social positives, but by staying there, I must get a full time job, get an apartment and roommates, get a drivers license and a car OR find a way of transportation on Buffalo's crap public transit system.  These are the factors I'm dealing with.

These are the things I can't control.  However, the things I can control are my body, my relationships with people, and my art making.  And hopefully, I plan to achieve what I want in 2014.

Though this is required by my school, it means so much more to me that just a school project.  This will be the biggest art undertaking I have ever tried to make.  I have never worked on this scale under a single topic.  Though I have no idea how this will go, I just want to be proud of myself when I see my work hanging on the gallery wall.
I want to create music this year.  This past semester, I've been working with my boyfriend and my friend Phil to create music.  So far, it's been a rough road, and we haven't done much.  However, I really want to work hard this next semester/year and create something I'm proud of, even if it's only a four song EP we release for free.  I want to create music so one day I can look back and point at it and say, hey, I made that.  I helped make that.  I play a bass on that EP, and I sing on it.  That's pretty damn cool.
More specifically, once I'm done with my senior thesis (or once I'm settled with how it's going and have spare time), I want to start on a new narrative that is inspired by the indie game HOTLINE MIAMI (blood and neon, yeah!), which in turn was inspired by the movie DRIVE and 80s culture and colors.  I love neons and fluorescents, and creating a narrative that reflects that and then is executed graphically would be my desire.  I have no ideas for this yet, but I want to.  Here are some images that show what is inspiring me.

The first image is by amazing artist kurkoboltsi on deviant art (click through name for piece)

I already started exploring yoga again, and hopefully, I stick with it.  I also may want to try to start running.  I want to start a habit of a certain type of exercise that I will continue after I graduate that doesn't require a gym.  Both yoga and running fall under this category, and are both healthy and good for your body. 
Get off the damn computer and read a book!
Nights where I take a long, luxurious, sweet smelling bath or a nice shower with my favorite shower gel.  Nights where I use my favorite body butters and lotions, face washes and creams, exfoliants and face masks.  Nights where I paint my nails and eat a square of dark chocolate while I watch youtube videos.  I don't spend this time currently, and it would probably help to de-stress, especially in the coming months.
This means more veggies and fruits.  More water and less juice and soda.  Less candy.  I wont give up my cheese and bread just yet, but I'll eat it with an apple now.  Stop buying chips or cheese doodles or cookies at the store.  Start to explore the fresh produce section of my local wegmans and get to know it a lot better! 
I had my first job this past semester, and for the first time, I had a bunch of pocket money.  I was a little overwhelmed, and spent money when I shouldn't have been spending.  My goal for this coming semester, specifically, is to stop spending money on clothing, makeup, and body products.  I have enough to last me for a while, and don't need any more.  My only exclusion from this is if I need an essential (for example, I know some of my camis are looking a little worn, since I've had them for years and years.  I might need new ones soon).  No more frivolous spending!
Last but not least, I hope to be living in an apartment I pay for myself with a full time job by the end of the year.  Obviously I aim to gain this when I graduate during the summer, but by the end of the year I hope to be "settled" in to paying bills, transport, etc.  Also, by settle, I don't mean starting to settle down in a house ready to start a family.  I'm no where near that point yet!!
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